if you don’t have anything nice to say then come sit next to me and we will make fun of people together

shavingryansprivates:

“I’ve lost weight!” I announced.

Everyone congratulated me.

But Weight was the name of my son.

mcrshavedmywife:

a group of thirteen year olds wearing adventure time shirts and converse walk through the hallways of school laughing and yelling ‘come at me bro’ at people who pass by because they are different and random, unlike other teens

cosmo tip #249

expertcosmotips:

when hes having sex with you, shout out your own name instead of his.